Trees Grow without Being Taught
Individual Talk
From:Beyond Psychology
In stock
"The moment you start thinking how to help children to grow without any competitive spirit you are already on the wrong track, because whatever you are going to do is going to give the children..."
"The moment you start thinking how to help children to grow without any competitive spirit you are already on the wrong track, because whatever you are going to do is going to give the children..."
Osho continues:
"That's why you are asking 'How?'
"According to me, the function of the parents is not how to help the children grow – they will grow without you. Your function is to support, to nourish, to help what is already growing. Don't give directions and don't give ideals. Don't tell them what is right and what is wrong: let them find it by their own experience.
"You can do only one thing and that is share your own life. Tell them that you have been conditioned by your parents, that you have lived within certain limits, according to certain ideals, and because of these limits and ideals you have missed life completely, and you don't want to destroy your children's lives. You want them to be totally free – free of you, because to them you represent the whole past.
"It needs guts and it needs immense love in a father, in a mother, to tell the children, 'You need to be free of us. Don't obey us – depend on your own intelligence. Even if you go astray it is far better than to remain a slave and always remain right. It is better to commit mistakes on your own and learn from them, rather than follow somebody else and not commit mistakes. Then you are never going to learn anything except following – and that is poison, pure poison.'
"It is very easy if you love. Don't ask how, because how means you are asking for a method, a methodology, a technique – and love is not a technique.
"Love your children, enjoy their freedom. Let them commit mistakes, help them to see where they have committed a mistake. Tell them, 'To commit mistakes is not wrong – commit as many mistakes as possible, because that is the way you will be learning more. But don't commit the same mistake again and again, because that makes you stupid.'
"So it is not going to be a simple answer from me. You will have to figure it out living with your children moment to moment, allowing them every possible freedom.
"For example, in small things:
"In my childhood, and it has been the same for centuries, the children are being taught: 'Go to bed early, and get up early in the morning."
"According to me, the function of the parents is not how to help the children grow – they will grow without you. Your function is to support, to nourish, to help what is already growing. Don't give directions and don't give ideals. Don't tell them what is right and what is wrong: let them find it by their own experience.
"You can do only one thing and that is share your own life. Tell them that you have been conditioned by your parents, that you have lived within certain limits, according to certain ideals, and because of these limits and ideals you have missed life completely, and you don't want to destroy your children's lives. You want them to be totally free – free of you, because to them you represent the whole past.
"It needs guts and it needs immense love in a father, in a mother, to tell the children, 'You need to be free of us. Don't obey us – depend on your own intelligence. Even if you go astray it is far better than to remain a slave and always remain right. It is better to commit mistakes on your own and learn from them, rather than follow somebody else and not commit mistakes. Then you are never going to learn anything except following – and that is poison, pure poison.'
"It is very easy if you love. Don't ask how, because how means you are asking for a method, a methodology, a technique – and love is not a technique.
"Love your children, enjoy their freedom. Let them commit mistakes, help them to see where they have committed a mistake. Tell them, 'To commit mistakes is not wrong – commit as many mistakes as possible, because that is the way you will be learning more. But don't commit the same mistake again and again, because that makes you stupid.'
"So it is not going to be a simple answer from me. You will have to figure it out living with your children moment to moment, allowing them every possible freedom.
"For example, in small things:
"In my childhood, and it has been the same for centuries, the children are being taught: 'Go to bed early, and get up early in the morning."
| Publisher | Osho International |
|---|---|
| Duration of Talk | 92 mins |
| File Size | 19.7 MB |
| Type | Individual Talks |
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